In the design industry, it is not uncommon for a designer to work as part of a team. As with all group projects, there can be a certain level of friction between members and this friction can be blown out of proportion when additional restrictions are added. Time and budget restraints are the most common restrictions on a project. When the pressure to conform to these restrictions is pushed to the brink of destruction, the group leader will distribute the pressure amongst the rest of the group.

What complicates the situation is the individual, their lifestyle choices and personal struggles. We can never know the whole story and it makes it difficult to demand a particular level of involvement from each individual without understanding their unique skills, flaws and general personality traits.

While battling anxiety myself, I have struggled working in a group which places the project at a lower priority. When other people rely on me to contribute in one way or another, I feel the pressure is even heavier on me to produce a higher standard of work. This pressure causes an increase in my anxiety and has caused disruption in my life in the past. I have realised that the only way to keep your head-space clear of uncertainty and paranoia is to talk about it. Both professional and personal relationships can help in this situation and even just getting a second opinion (to your own) is an important part of growth as an individual and as a designer.

One of my recent project has caused me to second guess my position in the group dynamic, whether as a result of anxiety or reasonable doubt. The pressure of time constraints has filtered down to the individuals and some of us cope better than others. I have felt a distance between myself and my group as if they had decided my skills and input were irrelevant. When the lecturer has then asked something of me, my ability to produce anything is hindered by my lack of involvement in the group. Am I being let down by my group for not providing me with the documents promised by them or am I suffering mild paranoia and should really be taking responsibility for my own inability to perform to the standard expected by my lecturers and tutors? Why do I feel like the lecturer is disappointed in me rather than disappointed in my group? Perhaps, I am unaware of the discussions made with the other members and should focus on taking responsibility for my own contributions.

This is the discussion I have been having with my personal and professional network; a struggle I am sure many professionals have had at one stage or another; something about myself I will grow to understand.